Dogs: When They Pee, They Pee.

Dogs. You either love them or you hate them. If you hate them, I think you're crazy.

How can you hate such precious creatures? So cute and loving and cuddley... They are just too adorable for words.

My roommates just recently got a 5 month old puppy. Its a mut that they adopted from the shelter. How nice. The dog is a PAIN IN THE ASS. She's scared of everyone and everything. She will hardly come up to anyone besides her two "owners" and if you try to pet her she runs away like the little bitch she is.

They have just recently started taking the pup to training classes, so she's getting a little bit better with the rest of the roommates but she still doesn't listen.

During the day at our house, 3 out of the 5 people are normally always gone. 2 work full time, 1 is still in school while myself and my roommate Jeff are home randomly throughout the day depending on our schedules, so during the day, Jeff and myself take care of the dog or just leave the dog outside to explore.

Today I went to the grocery store and when I came back the dog, (who's name is Paws by the way) was sitting at the door whining to come in. So I let the dog in and went along with my business. About 20 minutes after I put my groceries away and ate a nice lunch, I went back into the living room to get some strawberries.

I sit down on the couch and the dog immediately sticks her head up in interest and then gives me those puppy dog eyes saying she wants to be pet.

So I get up off the couch... Take about 2 steps towards Paws and BAM, I step, barefoot, into a large puddle of liquid. I immediately freak out since I know for a fact that I just stepped in dog piss. I put the dog outside and start to clean up this mess she made.

Now the dog peed, obviously. But this pile of piss was the size of a fucking Smart Car. I started to clean up the pile and I noticed that the pile strategically maneuvered its way underneith the entire couch. So it made me wonder... why the fuck did this dog pee so fucking much!? In the house none the less?!

So I clean the monster pile of piss, wash my hands, and then get in the bath tub to wash my feet of the piss mess. I then go outside to have a one on one talk with Paws to tell her that she is on my Shit List and is literally "In the Dog House." I was going to pet her until I realized the bitch dug a huge hole in the lawn. So I gave up and went inside to finish eating my strawberries.

This was the non-highlight of my day. Thanks Paws, you're the best!!

UPDATE: Paws is in more trouble. After peeing in the house and digging her first hole, I come to find out that she also shit in Jeff's room and decided to RE-DIG the same hole she dug yesterday after Jeff filled the hole in. Hope the hot sauce tastes good the next time you try to dig that damn hole. BAD DOG.